Let us be clear
Sex on a grand scale. No love, no playtime
" Love and Playtime, together, that is the best.
Can't find love? Then be my guest."
"Love is patient, Love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking. It is not easily angered.
Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."
You have read these words about "love". I am sure. Corinthians: 13. Written on the silver plate, the wedding and Anniversary cards, decorated with flowers, often quoted.
There is no mention of anything physical. Not even a hint of something sexual.
Sex is actually about biology. Sex is the "shuffling" of the parental genes to create a new, absolutely unique individual. This occurs during "meiosis" when the egg and sperm are formed. Virtually all eukaryotes [body cells have a nucleus] must reproduce sexually. All complex eukaryotes must reproduce sexually. We humans are complex eukaryotes.
In the 250,000 year history of homo sapiens, of the 100 billion born and 7 billion currently living, all 100 billion were the result of the fusion of sperm and ovum. I n science terms, the sperm in the vagina needs to reach the ovum in the fallopian tube, and the fertilized ovum needs to implant in the uterine mucosa. With all due respect to the author of the tale, the Holy Spirit did not give Mary the baby Jesus.
The Bible said sex is for the procreation. For all life on earth, for hundreds of millions of years, this was absolutely true. How many eggs, how many offspring? Sperm and pollen is cast upon the water and the wind, never to find the ovum. Many more are born than can possibly survive. Infant mortality in the natural world is prodigious. Predation, disease, starvation, trauma, take a fearful toll. Still species seem to survive. Nature has a "balance". Sexual activity [mating season, we say] is a seasonal event in many animal species. If you watch them, the act seems quite perfunctory. I saw a television documentary recently, observing the behavior of African antelope. The Wildebeest bull, sniffing and licking, searching his harem for a receptive female. He finds her. After a short chase, he mounts. A few thrusts and it is done. The female is back to eating grass. He wanders off to find another. Pregnancy rate is very high. Calves are born eight months later. All at once, usually in the morning. Predators are overwhelmed by the numbers. Still, hyenas and lions kill thousands. Many calves just get lost [they are doomed]. River crossings drown hundreds. Crocodiles take many. But, in the end, the population remains stable.
This is uncontrolled sex on a grand scale. Two hundred fifty thousand males try to service 750,000 females. Pregnancy rate very high. The birth, measured against human standards, is easy. But seventy percent of Wildebeest calves do not survive the first year.
OK. Humans are not Wildebeest. Homo Sapiens is much more complicated. First of all, after a slow start, we have solved the infant mortality problem. Now we have another issue. Too many of us. In Canada, United States and western Europe the numbers seem to be leveling out. We are planning and preventing. Birth control medications, IUD's, tubal ligation, vasectomy and the good old condom. Also, women are less enthusiastic about spending all of their reproductive years doing just that. They want time for themselves; career, sport, travel.
The human should no longer in a race to reproduce.Make it "later" for the pregnancy, and then, "two's enough". A lot of ejaculation happens without a chance of conception. For example, in a relationship lasting twenty years, with two pregnancies, two children, intercourse may have happened 2000 times. A fertilization rate of .1%. Not much, compared to the Wildebeest, who was fucked once during the year and will have a calf to show for it.
So, for the human, most sexual activity is just for the play. Is this playtime important? Yes it is. First of all, the "drive" to experience it is very strong, it would appear. The human male is constantly searching for, or in pursuit of, the playtime.
Since we now understand that "sex" is actually taking place at a cellular level [meiosis], I no longer want to refer to this activity as "sex". I like the term "playtime". "Playtime" is a good word, because it is rare that someone wants two cells that have undergone meiosis to fuse together. That is sex. Sex, for the human, needs to be an increasingly rare event. Let's do lots of the playtime.. Humans love to play. We do everything. There is nothing we haven't tried. We ski, we surf, we hang glide, we sky dive. We race in boats, cars and aircraft. We sing, play music and dance. We play football, basketball, baseball and hockey.
And we want to play with another human's body. Man and lady, man and man, lady and lady. Your choice. To this activity we bring our talent for innovation. We seem to be ready to try anything. We suck, we fuck, we kiss, we tongue, we do mouth, anus and vagina. We try every position you can imagine. We try every kind of toy. That's just a short list.
We need our playtime.
OK. How to get this playtime? One way is to find a partner. Then you can play every day. This is great while it lasts. If you are not married, studies indicate the steady playtime with the partner will be enjoyed for about two years. Marriage will last longer. Many times the marriage lasts much longer than the playtime.
A marriage with no playtime is a sad time. I know some of these. If there are sufficient resources, [money and properties] there will be a divorce. If not, then its an endurance test to the end.
Nothing like playtime is mentioned in Corinthians. It reads, love is kind, love is patient, love trusts, love perserveres. Yes, but there had better be playtime. If there is no playtime, the"kind", the"patient", the"trust", will fade away. The playtime is the glue, the bond, that keeps everything together. All you husbands and wives, keep going with the playtime. Look after your physical body. Save your muscles. Experiment, innovate. Play.
You need playtime to keep that love described in the Corinthians going.
But what if you are among the ranks of the unmarried?. Only one half the population, age 20-60 years is married. Then what? The "marriage-like relationship" looks difficult to sustain. Maybe you are married but the playtime has "trickled off the court".
Are you are just out of luck? Is this fair? No more playtime for the rest of your life?
Not so. You can simply pay for the playtime. There is nothing wrong with this option.
Regardless of how you find it, playtime is going to need money.. Think about it.